The team was fantastic.  They had come together and done something no other team had done.  They reached a level no football team had reached in years at the school and it was over.  This was what happened when they lost to the eventual state champions.

               At the time I was the strength coach of the program and I was frustrated.  This same team always knocked us out of the tournament.  I felt like all the effort I asked of them in the off-season was for no reason if they eventually were going to be stopped by the same team.  I was dealing with how to handle failure.

               Sports and life are similar.  If we put ourselves out into the field of life we may not get the results we want and how we respond will impact how we lead.  Here are a few thoughts on how to respond to our failures in a positive way.

Tigger or Eyore

               Maybe you watched Winnie the Pooh or your kids did.  Two characters in the cartoon were Tigger and Eyore.  Tigger was a tiger who couldn’t stop bouncing.  No matter the situation he kept hopping.  On the other hand it could be the greatest day in the world and Eyore was always down in the dumps.

               In leading ourselves we have the option to be like Tigger and bounce back or be an Eyore and stay down and depressed.  Maybe you have heard of the 24-hour rule.  Give yourself 24 hours to either celebrate or wallow . . . and then move on.  When we fail, it can feel comforting to throw and wallow in a pity party, but to keep moving forward, we need to bounce like Tigger, learn, grow, and move on.

Focus on Truth

               Bouncing can be challenging, but I hope this idea will help you.  Take a look at this diagram for a minute:

 

               Without going in depth, our thoughts impact our feelings which impact our actions.  If our thoughts are focused on something untrue then we may start being like Eyore.  On the other hand let’s inject one simple thing into this diagram:

               Is whatever you are saying to yourself about the situation true?  If it is not then replace the lie with what is true.  I will illustrate in our next idea.

Failure is Not Final

               Maybe you have heard the story of the story of the salesperson who comes into the office of Tom Watson Sr. (CEO of IBM at the time) with his resignation in hand.  He had just lost a multi-million dollar deal and assumed the worst.  After explaining what happened he was walking out of the office to pack up his stuff when Watson stops him and asks “why would I accept this when I just invested millions of dollars in your education?”

               What did Watson do?  He injected the truth that this was a failure, but it was not final.  The truth is it was a growth opportunity.  The individual had tried to do the right thing, saw where he messed up and admitted it and Watson wanted him to learn and grow.

               When you fail as a leader do you think the world has ended and then stop taking risks?  Do you start buying into the lie that failure is final and you cannot come back from it?  Bouncing back like Tigger can be hard, but when we inject truth or have others help us inject truth we can bounce back, grow and be even better.

               What is a failure you need to bounce back from?  Is there a lie you are telling yourself?  What is the truth you need to replace it with?  Need help breaking through any limitations in leading yourself?  Go HERE to schedule a no-cost, powerful coaching session to help you bounce back from failure and raise your self-leadership lid.  Lead Well.

 

© 2024 Wheeler Coaching, All Rights Reserved